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We were called by the home health agency to come check on my Mom. By the time we got there, she had been taken into a back room at the local rest home. Initially, she recognized me and cried about what was going on. However, the minute she got her arms around me, she began to “rapid cycle” into someone I didn’t even know. The nurse as well as my husband had to grab her and pull her arms away from me. The only way we could get her under control was sedation and then have her transported by ambulance to the nearest psychiatric hospital.

When I reflect back on those days, I am filled with a mixture of emotions. For four and a half years, I was a part of the Sandwich Generation.  The Sandwich Generation is  a term used for people who are trying to balance caring for parents while still raising and/or caring for their children. In all honestly, I can’t say I mastered those years.  At times, I was torn between needing to be with my family, yet the emergency of my Moms care required me to be else where. On the other hand, now that my Mom is sitting at the feet of Jesus; I am so thankful for those last four years and for the lessons I learned while being her care giver.

I was more fortunate than some “sandwichers,”  I have a husband who is a care giver by nature. And when he would step in, it wasn’t because he felt neglected by me but because he knew I needed a break.  And rather than push the responsibility off on someone else, he came in and took over when I couldn’t go anymore. During those Sandwich years, I wish I had been able to read the book, Because You Care by Cecil Murphey and Twila Belk.  I know it would have given me encouragement on the difficult days. And reassurance I was doing the right thing during days of turmoil.

Because You Care, is a book full of stories from those who have “been there.” They know what it is like to be the care giver for someone you love. The last two chapters are practical suggestions for the care giver. The first is titled, “God’s Strength for Caregivers” and the second is “Because You Can No Longer Cope.”

I highly recommend this book to all who are a care givers, whether you are in the Sandwich Generation or caregiver to a spouse!  ~b

Because You Care

Book Excerpt:
(from the beginning)
 
This Is Who You Are
From Cec and Twila
Others may call you brave. They’ll use words like noble or sacrificial. They’ll admire and applaud you because you’ve offered your life to make yourself available to someone who needs a long-term caregiver.
“I couldn’t do what you’re doing for him,” a friend says.
You listen to the words your friend speaks, and you like hearing the compliments. Yet as you listen and smile, you don’t see yourself as exceptional. You’re doing the right thing for someone you love, and that gives you peace. You also know the reason you’ve devoted your energies to another person.
You can express that reason in a single sentence: “I do it because I care.” You might say it’s because you love the person, or you may do it because of a strong sense of commitment to God and to your loved one. Regardless of how you express yourself, you’re determined to give yourself as fully as you can.
Some days you may not feel like loving anyone. You get tired, lose your temper, or think of the things you didn’t accomplish. During the worst times, you wish the situation would change. And in those dark moments, you’ve probably prayed, Dear Lord, please take this burden from me.
The situation probably won’t change for a long time—perhaps years. It’s not the kind of life you would have imagined. You probably envisioned living out your years in blissful peace. Caring for your loved one wasn’t part of your dream, but this is the life you have. Despite the moments of sadness, perhaps even regret, your answer remains the same: “I care.”
Taken from:  Because You Care.  Text Copyright © 2012 by Cecil Murphey, Twila Belk.  Artwork Copyright © 2012 by Betty Fletcher. Published by Harvest House Publishers, Eugene, Oregon.  Used by permission.

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Grand Prize Giveaway Description

  • Book—Because You Care: Spiritual Encouragement for Caregivers
  • Book—Hope and Comfort for Every Season
  • Hallmark journal, list pad, and memo pad stack
  • Glade “Angel Whispers” candle
  • Hershey’s Bliss dark chocolate
Instructions to Enter the Grandprize Drawing:
  1. Leave a comment about the book or author on the blog post during the blog tour.
  2. Each blog tour host will draw one name from those comments to send to the tour coordinator by October 12.
  3. The coordinator will put all the names into a drawing, and select a winner, using an online randomizer.
  4. The coordinator will notify the blog tour host who submitted the winning name.
  5. The blog tour host will notify the winner and collect the mailing info so the author can send out the prize.

Bios
Twila Belk and Cecil (Cec) Murphey are both long-term caregivers for their spouses. Twila, aka the Gotta Tell Somebody Gal, is a writer and speaker who loves to brag on God. She works fulltime with Cec as his manager, personal assistant, and biggest fan. Cec is a veteran author who has written or co-written more than 125 published books, including the bestsellers 90 Minutes in Heaven (with Don Piper) and Gifted Hands (with Dr. Ben Carson). His books have sold in the millions and have brought hope and encouragement to countless readers around the world. Cec and Twilas’ second co-authored book, Heavenly Company: Entertaining Angels Unaware (Guideposts Books), released in August 2012.
For more info about Twila, visit: www.gottatellsomebody.com.

For more info about Cec, visit:www.cecilmurphey.com.
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